My theories have no scientific proof, but I am sure if lets say the "Brookings Institute" wanted to spend some time on it I will be justified. Honestly I am usually right about everything that I say! That is a joke for all you Moejank detractors. I am only arrogant in the sense of being funny. For instance; You: "Hey Moejank thats a nice shirt" Moejank: " Of course it is, why else would I have it on?" Okay, I got it out and I am ready to explain my theory.
Playground syndrome affects mainly the female gender. In many cases a male can catch this disease. It begins in your formative years, an idea placed into a young girls mind (inception) that will stick with her until she is grown and in serious relationships with the other sex. It usually occurs on the play yard but can take place in the classroom or other social gatherings. A young girl will approach an adult, whether it be a parent or teacher. It will always be someone the girl trusts to help them solve their problem. Now to no fault of this child, a young boy has picked on her. Usually its the hair pulling reflex that young boys seem to develop and assume is a weakness to the other gender. I send my condolences to the new age school boy who does this because Willow Smith is teaching these girl to "whip it"... real hard. WATCH OUT NOW!!!
The adult involved here is mainly at fault. They are responsible for giving advice that will lead the young girl to empower herself to overcome the circumstance. As the young girl looks at the much older more experienced adult for a way to heal the pain she is receiving at the hands of her male counterpart. The adult in this situation places a thought so gruesome, so ill thought out into their mind that it will ruin this young girls future relationships for a very long time. The adult will say " That young boy is only picking on you because he likes you..." Now if this isn't the dumbest peice of knowledge passed onto a young girl I don't know what is. The adult has now made the girl assume that it is acceptable for a male to pick on her and give her physical and emotional pain as a labor of love and care. This will prove to ruin many relationships in her future.
Lets fast forward to the female as a young adult. We can say she is between the ages of 18 to 26. She is in her first "serious" relationship. Week after week she is put through turmoil and pain by a disrespectful, neglectful, and inconsiderate boyfriend. This boyfriend avoids her feelings and focuses on the things that make him happy to be around her. If it doesn't suit him he will not yield to it or even compromise. He has probably ripped her away from her friends and family and alienated her to the point where no one can show her support. She sees no way out, she is completely dependent on him. He treats her like dog poo, she doesn't remember the last time she was happy with him. When she tries to go to those people she trusts, she realizes that they can not support any resolution with her "man". There is no talking her out of her "love" for him, she thinks that how he shrugs off her feelings is an attempt at making her stronger. Its that or whatever else he feeds her so she is quiet enough for him to watch the game, or coax her into forgetting date night for boys night. We have seen it happen, some of us were victims and some of us were culprits!
Here is the point my friends, it starts with the young girl. Its starts by setting high expectations of our young boys. We have to teach these girls that the man should be the perfect compliment to her life, not a project or chore! Listen girls if you think you can change your man's attitude you are wrong. His mother had more time to deal with him and she probably isn't done teaching him. Do you think you will have more influence on him than his mother?! He acts immature because he is immature, and thats why he pulls your hair on the school yard. Thats why he is a jerk and finds a new way to make you cry or feel bad about yourself. Let him go, let it go. For goodness sake lets try and make our young girls want more for themselves and expect more out the young boy. I am only speaking from the female side because I see too many men get away with their immaturity.
As for the boy pulling hair at a young age. He should be disciplined, taught the importance of respect for other peoples space. Thats for another day though. Lets me sum up this syndrome though.
"If you, your friend or anyone you know is being treated like the scum at the bottom of a public trash can in their relationship and still try to find a way to defend or fix their relationship despite numerous failures....they have PLAYGROUND SYNDROME"
Lets do what we can to rid our friends and family of this disastrous disease.
Very interesting. But seriously, "Let him go, let it go"? Easier said than done.
ReplyDeleteYou're right, though. Too many women stay with men who treat them like shit. And it's a damn shame. But where's the antidote?
I often find that the right thing to do for ourselves is the simplest but the hardest. The beauty of all of this is that if you are in that situation you are the antidote. Owning up to mistakes in the past, learning from them and moving on. It is always harder to do these things than it is to say them. Actions speak louder than words and if you use that as a baseline you will discover a lot about yourself and your mate. The more you realize its a one way selfish street, the more independent you will have to become and the more strength you will have to do so. It's a tough situation but as humans we have the power to overcome it.
ReplyDeleteseems like you know alot about the inner workings of a little's girl mind. did you have your hair pulled by a young lad way back when?
ReplyDeletei disagree that its the adults fault. i think its all on the woman. women just need to decide what they want and go with it. i think alot of the trouble happens because women are more emotionally selfish than men. they hate the idea of being alone, so they're willing to tag around a guy long enough until they find something better. of course this ain't the case with every woman, but its a consistent pattern that i've seen throughout college.